on girls and makeup

just a couple of weeks ago i asked my daughter what she wants for christmas. she said she wanted a dog. today we went to the Toys 'R Us store, and she was making a list of 5 different gifts she wants to get for christmas from her relatives from Alan's side. she completed her list without showing any indication that she's too impatient for christmas.but since she was being too adorably nice today, as a reward, we told her to pick any toy she wants to buy now, and we'll buy it.she said she doesn't wanna buy anything today, coz she wants to save everything for christmas. she was pretty adamant about that.

but then on our way towards the exit, we passed by a section of shelves where girls' accessories are on display. and one item, i shouldn't have been surprised, immediately caught her attention. "Nanay, Nanay, i want this!!! can we buy this now, please??? this is my reward gift! you said i'm entitled to one toy today! i want this!"

and what she wanted, actually, is this (and it's not even a toy!)

well, it was almost predictable that she'd want that... since last year my five year-old daughter has been fascinated with makeups!

but of course we didn't buy it for her. no matter how well she behaved at the toy store today.

bah, in my time, girls that age don't play with make ups (hmmm.... probably because makeups weren't sold as "toys" in toy stores back then?).

and there's something about young girls putting makeup on their faces just for fun, that just didn't sit right with parents... not just mine, but all the other parents i knew! for in my time... if you're just a teenager and you're already putting cosmetics on your face, such as makeup, and you wear it in public, your peers won't look at you and say, "wow! you look fab!" they won't think you look elegant or sophisticated. instead, you'll be regarded as "malandi" (flirt). unless you're a star/celebrity, in which case, you're exempted from this sort of stereotyping because that's part of your job.

if you're not, there are just several handful special occasions in which, if you're below 18, you're allowed to put heavy makeup on your young and delicate skin... such as... (and this also applies to little girls below age 6)

1. if you're one of the muses of the sagala or flores de mayo
2 .if you're attending a wedding to which you're one of the bride's maids, or the flower girls
3. if you're participating in some kind of a beauty contest, or any other kind of activity which will require you to come up on stage and sing or dance or act or talk or walk in front of more than one hundred people (if the number of people watching amounts to less than that, then the ocassion's not that special and wearing makeup just ain't worth the effort. it is desirable (in that age!) yes. but not required.

as i grew older, i witnessed the fact that nowadays, younger generations start to wear (light) makeup in high school. oh, no doubt girls here in Europe do that much earlier than Filipina girls do in the Philippines (most Filipino parents are still conservative, after all). and i also noticed that nowadays, wearing makeup in school or in public will no longer earn you a reputation of being flirty... but most of the time you will have peers, friends, classmates who will whisper behind your back and say you're only pretty because you're wearing makeup. ha-ha.

well, i'm not too worried that my daughter will have friends who'll think she's malandi just because she's playing with makeup and putting them on her face. neither am i worried that when she reached 12 she'll want to wear makeup to go to school and that her friends might say she's not naturally pretty.... we're in Europe.... makeup kits are sold all over the toy stores! all the little girls i know have some sort of a makeup set among their toys. it's "domestically legal". one time i picked up my daughter from her leisure class only to find her wearing blush on and lipstick and eye shadow. i totally freaked out and told the school coordinator that i didn't want them, ever, to put makeup on my daughter's face, she just looked at me as if i'm a maniac or something. she asked why and i said, "because she's only four years old" and then i looked around me and i saw other girls the same age as my daughter's wearing makeup themselves. apparently, they sometimes play "make over" in their leisure class, too. so, okay... wearing, or putting on, or playing with, makeup, at the earliest time they become aware of it, is not inappriopriate anymore. they're being sold as toys, so of course children can play with them and wear them.

my only concern now is to make sure that these toy makeups do not contain ingredients that are harmful to the skin. i'm sure a lot of Filipino women my age will be able to relate when i say that one of the reasons why most pinay girls from my generation didn't like to wear makeup was because we were so worried that some makeup ingredients are going to harm our skin. i came from a family with acne-prone skin (my husband did, too) so as much as possible, i tried to avoid putting any cosmetic stuff on my face. i didn't even start to put on compact face powder on a regular basis until i was 30 (seriously!). and even now, some makeup advertisements boast about not containing paraben (a harmful substance) in their products.  that makes me wonder what these toy makeup for children are made up of?

i was able to coax chichi into agreeing to give me some time first to research the makeup's ingredients to make sure it's safe for her to use. aside from the fact that my daughter is always agreeable, i only had to show her her father's acne scars to point out that's what happens if she puts anything harmful on her face. baaaaadddd... but hey, if it gets my message across, well....